How to Be Perfect
by Ron Padgett
Everything is perfect, dear friend. - Jack Kerouac
Get some sleep.
Don't give advice.
Take care of your teeth and gums.
Don't be afraid of anything beyond your control. Don't be afraid, for instance,
that the bulding will collapse as you sleep, or that someone you love will suddenly drop dead.
Eat an orange every morning.
Be friendly. It will make you happy.
Raise your pulse to 120 beats per minute for 20 straight minutes four or five times a week doing
anything you enjoy.
Hope for everything. Expect nothing.
Take care of things close to home first. Straighten up your room before you save the world.
Then save the world.
Know that the desire to be perfect is probably the veiled expression of another desire
- to be loved, perhaps, or not to die.
Make eye contact with a tree.
Be skeptical about all opinions, but try to see some value in each of them.
Dress in a way that pleases both you and those around you.
Do not speak quickly.
Learn something every day. (Dzien dobre!)
Be nice to people before they have a chance to behave badly.
...
Look at that bird over there.
After dinner, wash the dishes.
Visit foreign countries, except those whose inhabitants hacve expressed a desire to kill you.
Don't expect your children to love you, so they can, if they want.
Don't think that progress exists. It doesn't.
Walk upstairs.
From How to Be Perfect by Ron Padgett. Copyright © 2007 by Ron Padgett.
Published by Coffee House Press (www.coffeehousepress.org). Used by
permission of the publisher. All rights reserved.